Tuesday, March 13


Skye very rarely sits still. She jumps and climbs, dances and wiggles non stop from the moment she wakes up until she falls asleep at the end of the day. She doesn’t like to be interrupted when doing something important so at various points in the day her wiggling and jiggling increases until I have to ask her if she needs to use the bathroom. A look of relief come into her eyes, it has obviously not occurred to her to stop playing for a minute, but she will stubbornly say, “no, I am busy,” and carry on with her legs twisted round each other. Twenty seconds later she will suddenly shout “I NEED A WEE WEE!” and make a frantic dash to the bathroom.

It has become so ingrained into the routine of the day for me to ask her if she needs a wee wee, that I seem to have forgotten that it is not the sort of thing that you ask other people.

Whilst on the phone to a client the other day I watched her dancing around with her legs entwined and without thinking asked sternly, “excuse me but do you need a wee wee?” I heard a sharp intake of breath from the lady on the telephone followed by a short pause, a clearing of the throat and then, “er, no I don’t actually.” Of course I apologised profusely, explained that I was talking to my daughter and all was forgiven.

A couple of days later I went to Sorrento with Carlo. As we parked the car he mentioned that he needed to find a bathroom at some point. But we were lured into the motorbike shop where we weighed up the pros and cons of me buying a motorino.

The pros were that I wouldn’t have to walk absolutely everywhere, often clocking up to 12 kms per day. I could arrive at my destination in time, unsweaty and not panting like a dog. And of course the added bonus of not having to lug heavy shopping bags halfway down a mountain.
The cons included the fact that I am completely incapable of getting a motorino onto its stand, no matter how easy everyone tells me it is. Countless times I have lost my balance trying to tug the heavy bike onto its stand and either created a domino effect, knocking down every bike parked in the vicinity or I have remained trapped between the wall and the bike as diners in nearby restaurants watch on in amusement.
Other cons are whether I would use the bike with Skye, the cost of insurance and most importantly, according to Carlo I might get fat if I used a scooter so would be better off walking. The men in the bike shop smiled knowingly and nodded their heads.

I didn’t like that one little bit so as we left the shop I got my own back. As we strolled past a nearby bar with a group of men sitting outside I remembered that Carlo had said he needed the bathroom and announced loudly, “You still haven’t done a wee wee! Go and do one now please!” Guffaws and sniggers were heard from the men outside the bar and one man stared at me in surprise with his mouth hanging open. Carlo stopped in his tracks, turned a satisfying shade of red and dragged me away to the safety of the car.

9 comments:

  1. Very good, Nicki...very good.
    Never pass a chance of pure revenge when it's given to you. NEVER.
    Meanwhile.I am giggling...
    BTW Noodle does the EXACT same thing holding it for ever and ever.
    I am also thinking you need some "scooter" lesson here...can I help?

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  2. If I were to ask Alexander that question in public nowadays he would be terribly embarrassed, but that hasn't always been the case.. I think it's a universal thing that happens with all kids (and husbands ;))!

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  3. Well done he deserved that..:) Anyone for a wee wee???
    People make the motorino thing look so easy!

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  4. very funny nicki---- he deserved that, and by the way, you could never get fat in Positano.... you can't take the motorino up and down the stairs can you?????? See you soon in Posi, we're coming home end of April- HEELLLPPPPP.....,

    Maggie in Canada

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  5. LOL. Hello, the above poster is right, there are places where you still cannot use a scooter so Carlo need not "worry".

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  6. You sure know how to get even!

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  7. You are too funny!

    I have been thinking about the whole scooter thing too (just to advoid having to "learn" to drive a car). I am just so worried about crashing it and I live in a ver FLAT part of Italy. I can't imagine how you drive in your town! You are far more brave than I!

    Cyn

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  8. Cara Nicki,
    che bello il tuo blog mi piace tantissimo!!!
    Spero che stai bene ci vediamo, un abbraccio
    Concetta da via Corvo Positano.

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