Thursday, March 29

lipgloss and bibs

For a few days now Skye has been arriving home from school with a sprinkling of glitter across her eyelids and cheeks. I had put it down to some messy art project but this morning discovered that this was not the case.

She ran into the classroom, wriggling out of her coat and leaving it on the floor in her excitement. Two little girls ran over to her, they all squealed, hugged, did a little jiggy dance together and then…

One little girl whipped a glittery lip gloss out of her pocket and brandished it in front of Skye. The three girls became still, eyes wide and serious, then slowly with the utmost care they took turns applying the gloss to each others cheeks and eyelids.

While I watched I had to chant to myself, ‘she is only four, not fourteen. Still four, not fourteen…’ Then my chant was broken by the teacher threateningly clearing her throat and beckoning for me to come closer.

“Your daughter does not have a bib,” she proclaimed.

A bib? Why would a fourteen, er, four year old need a bib? Bibs are for babies, not schoolkids, I thought. Aah, obviously I had got it wrong again, I must remember that things are done diffently in Italy. In a country where it is considered normal for a man to live with his Mamma until he is married of course it would be normal for a class of four to six year olds to still wear bibs while they eat.

“A bib?” I said as disdainfully as possible, “but we stopped using them years ago! She doesn’t wear bibs anymore.”
“Well she is the only child without one and she felt left out yesterday,” said the teacher , followed by an audible ‘hhmph!’
“Fine, I’ll see if I still have one around,” I sighed.

Back home I rummaged through the cupboard next to the fridge. At the very back, buried beneath some old teatowels, next to the strange shaped shot glasses that nobody can drink out of without dribbling, I found it. The bib of all bibs, never been used and still waiting for its moment of glory. I present to you, proudly modelled by Boomerang, the Sushi Bib…
I proudly folded it and placed it in her school bag, happy knowing that if my girl has to wear a baby bib, at least she will be the most trendy bib wearer in the school.


  1. a bib for 4 yr olds? you've got to be kidding..they should be taught to eat independently without them...silly italians, but i guess accidents do happen ;]

  2. Thank you, this now explains Giampaolo's bib like behaviour with his serviette!

  3. You're doing the right thing. If she must wear a bib, it sure as hell should be a unique one.

  4. This is just weird. In my world, kids can't wait to stop using bibs because they're the ultimate sign of baby-hood and if you are big enough not to wear a bib then you're almost all grown up. In my world, kids don't want to be younger than they are.

    Then again, in my world cool bibs like that one don't exist. I don't think I've ever used the words 'cool' and 'bib' in the same sentence before.

  5. Thats hilarious !!! School kids with bibs.
    This explains why my dad (italian born & bred) is a messy eater, maybe he still wants & needs a bib.

  6. The teacher probably hates sea food and will yell at you! At four my daughter would have told me to wear the baby thing!

  7. that post made me smile.

    love the picture of the cat modelling the bib. boomerang is very photogenic. :-)

  8. I knew kids in Italy were supposed to wear 'grembiule'(apron like uniforms) but bibs!

  9. Silly Italians!
    BUT...mmmmh...I am many of you are already with or married or would like to have an Italian companion/fiancée/lover/husband??? Many of these are the same men who live with their mothers. They used to wear a bib at 4/6 and probably will wear one while dining with you.
    Cammar, you're not helping with what you commented!

  10. Poppy will not only be the most trendy but the most sparkly bib wearer in her class!

  11. LOL. I can't believe the cat stood still that long to model that bib.

  12. Hysterical! True mum indeed, chanting "she's only 4, not 14 ..." LOL.
    I'm wondering how it is that the teacher is only now mentioning the bib? Didn't school term begin, oh let's say, months ago? Strange? And yep, also strange to have them wear bibs, but harmless and if she's having fun she may as well do it in style. Wondering what customs they have when they enter secondary education?

  13. Boomerang is a beautiful cat (and the bib is nice too).
    Will many people in her class know that it is sushi pictures oh her bib and not dribbles of food?

  14. I literally laughed out loud at the picture of your cat modeling the bib! But, just so I understand (for when I have kids here, ya know), the teachers are cool if the kids wear sparkly lip gloss as long as they have a bib on while they are doing it??

    I'm learning, I'm learning...

  15. Just found your comment on my other blog.

    I love what you write, but I better stick to superficial comments in the future... never mind.

    Oh, that cat is soooo cute!

  16. oh my... aint right to put a bib on the poor puddy tat... aint no self respecting cat would wear a bib.


  17. Cool bib. In France, they require all 3-5 year olds to bring a "serviette" for lunch, to tie around their necks. Not quite a bib, though.


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