I spent three months this summer helping out at one of the boat companies on the beach. Organizing boat trips to Capri, renting out boats, disembarking clients we get to talk to a lot of people. And we get asked a lot of questions. So here's a round up of this summers best questions:
(Note: I may or may not have used some of the answers below.)
Do your research, you are currently on mainland Italy, part of the continent of Europe.
2. "I need to book a boat from Ravello, can you do that?"
Ravello is a hilltown situated high up in the mountains above Amalfi. There is no boat access up a mountain. (He still insisted that he wanted a boat from there).
3. "What ocean is this anyway?"
If I tell you it is the Pacific would you believe me and go away?
Try robbing a bank and they might pick you up in one of those.
5. "Do you par-lay ing-ley-sey?" (I get asked this about a million times a day.)
I think I can manage that. (Then I often get praised about how good my English is, I tell them I've been practicing for a long time.)
6. "I'm staying at the Sirenuse, I wanna be picked up by boat"
If you know Positano you will know that this is fairly impossible as the hotel is way above the beach...And they still insist...
Um, not sure but it might be a while...
8. "Is the water from the drinking fountain drinkable?"
No, we put it there to kill off unsuspecting tourists.
9. "I need to get a leg wax."
Certainly, Ma'am, let me sell you a day trip to Capri where there are many fine beauty salons.
A boat tour of the Island of Capri by car...hmm good luck with that...